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Vancouver Canucks Twilight Zone: Playoffs, Baby

They did it, just barely.

New York Islanders v Vancouver Canucks
The Canucks did squeak into the playoffs, in the Twilight Zone.
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We all miss hockey at the moment. We’re all anxious not knowing when this will all be ending.

But what if the Canucks were still playing hockey games? What if the word “coronavirus” was just some bad joke your buddy came up with after a few too many cerveza’s in Mexico?

That’s where I come in. I’m going to be taking you through an alternate reality, a simpler timeline where our biggest concern was whether Brock Boeser was going to play in the top six.

*Disclaimer: On behalf of Nucks Misconduct, I want to officially have it on the record that we are an Anti-COVID-19 blog. This is an official declaration from myself, Nick Bondi, the head of the Nucks Misconduct Pandemic Response Panel.*

They survived. Barely.

The Canucks have made the playoffs, getting in after a game 82 win against the Vegas Golden Knights. Their prize is the Edmonton Oilers, who clinched the second spot in the Pacific Division with three games to go.

Vancouver will have to go up against McDavid and Draisaitl, two players who have a real good shot at winning the Hart Trophy. McDavid finished with 128 points and Draisaitl 133 — ridiculous point totals.

“They got a good team over there,” said Bo Horvat at the team’s media availability. “But if we stick to our game plan, I like our chances in the series.”

And they’ll be doing it without team MVP Jacob Markstrom. Unfortunately for Patrick Johnston, he didn’t get the scoop on his injury this time as Nucks Misconduct can confirm he’ll only be back from injury ‘late in the second round.’

And that’s going to hurt. McDavid and Draisaitl are going to win two games in this series by themselves. However much you want to protest, that’s unavoidable, like having no personal space on the Skytrain at rush hour.

So can the Canucks win four of five against the Oilers? That’s the main question heading into the series. Canucks management has met the goal of making the playoffs — now it’s time to see if they can hang with the elite of the league.

Editors note: Want some hockey talk that’s not completely hypothetical? Check out the latest episode of Power Of The Pure-L, where host Nick Bondi breaks down Pavel Bure’s 1992-93 season and Walter Isaacson’s Steve Jobs biography.