NUCKS Win!!! (Nothing) Lose Desert Hockey 1-0 to Yotes

That went well.

For the Yotes.

It’s OFFICIAL. The Nucks are missing offence. Not just Brock. But Vanek, Sven, Granlund and even Gaunce’s 2 goals would have helped.

Since the Nucks didn’t score any goals - zip - none - the recap format is changed to suit the results. Or the lack.

Introducing the New Shiny NM Beer Keg Recap Format!

Exciting infographics presented a heavy-drinker-friendly fashion.

That’s enough to make you drink - harder.

And that’s enough to make you drink more.

Yes, the Canucks finally outshot a team in the 3rd period. That’s enough to make the gamethread giddy with...well...another NM recap format change.

The NM Gamethreading stalwarts, while they were still conscious, offered to help me write the recap. Thanks, guys.

But, wait, even if that four word synopsis is more than you want to read, the gamethread just kept on giving the reasons behind the play. Like advanced stats, but with pithy words, not strange math.

If you were worried you may have missed one of the better Nucks games of the season, no worries - you didn’t. Not the worst. That was the last chess match with Yotes. Although we did get a goal in that game...

The good news is...uh...Marky only let in one goal - only thing is... Kuemper let in none.

Still the Nucks outshot the Yotes 27-24 - just not in the 1st when the game was decided. Would have been a big gamethread drinking time saver to have called it then.

Yotes were also out hit by the Nucks, 34-27. Yotes had 27 hits and 24 shots. That’s going to make the fancy dressed statisticians push their pencils in to the non-correlation column.

The Canucks Top 10 power play only got 1 chance to cash in - 3 or 4 PP ops are usually considered more optimal. But to draw penalties, have to force the other team to worry about your speed and skill and stuff.

There was a near tie at the last second of the 3rd, but Danny rang it off the post - because...Nuck luck.

Enjoy the video highlights - let us know when/if you see any.

How those Yotes colour guys can get so excited about a 1-zip game, only their pharma consultant guys can explain.

Anyhow...let’s hear from one of the Canucks’ goal scorers from the game.

.....

Oh...ok...let’s just hear from Bo, who led the team with 5 (fruitless) shots.

I suggest the Nucks hire a crack graphic artist - could draw some pretty nifty old skool penalties - maybe in duotone.

Over in the arid Green room, the mood was easier than said.

That’s it then. Another lousy loss to toss on the lousy loss streak. How lousy is this streak?

Last overall is within our grips only 4 points up and Yotes have game in hand.

Canucks might get 4th pick this year cheer up folks.

- Forty

You know it’s pretty lousy when Forty tries to cheer up a NM thread. Thanks, Forty!

His hopeful words inspired me to take a little spin on the fake lottery wheel of false hope.

Here’s the result.

Wooo! That’s the final result. And it came out that way every single time I photoshopped it, so you know it’s true.

What about you NM, is it time to take the pulse of possibility? Yes, I think it is.

There you have it. Whether you wanted it or not. On the bright side, there’s only one game left against the Yotes to test your powers of hockey fan concentration.

Moving on to LA, where the Kings got goal-whipped by the Blues 7-2 in their last game. And they’re 1 point out of the last wildcard. Maybe they’ll be happy to just get a point. And we’ll be happy just to see another Canucks goal - this season.

Have a tremendous week in this road trip through Cali-hell.