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NUCK Win!!! (New Players) - Lose old players and game to Avs 3-1

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We knew what to expect out of a TDL game. And the TDL.

NHL: Vancouver Canucks at Colorado Avalanche
ATTN: Zebras! Please step into my bench for a moment...
Ron Chenoy-USA TODAY Sports

Well....at least that’s over with. Do you feel the relief too? At least we didn’t have to witness a power play goal against in OT like the last Avs game.

Oh...you thought I was talking about the TDL? We’re not over that. Getting over a TDL can take days to read all the tweettle-dumbness followed by a month of anti-venom therapy. And the media fluff analysis will take weeks to sift through looking for a shred of non-obvious information.

Back to the game. Because that is what we play for - to fill in the dull space between the TDL and draft day.

Tonight the Nucks are in the Rocky Mountains to face Sakic and the Nordiques.

Thoughtfully, the NHL schedulers selected a more favourable travel location for the Canucks. In return, the NHL were free to select special officials to ensure a fair and balanced 5:2 against infraction ratio.

Are you ready to get Rocky Mtn high? Me neither.

1st Period

The game started pretty good - Canucks get some pressure off the opening faceoff. Within a minute Eddie was carving a MacKinnon tribute statue and was interrupted by a busybody zebra.

The Avs go on their dreaded power play. The Avs went off their dreaded power play.

Then something like a statistical singularity was observed. The Canucks get their own power play. We got a PP goal last game in the first period. And it made the difference.

Different game. Different players. Well...same players, less a power play specialist, but don’t get me started on the tense TDL negotiating analysis and hindsighted what-might-have-been-if-only-Westy-was-GM-for-a-day.

Anyhow the Nucks go off the powerplay.

Then the Avs go on their dreaded power play. The Avs went off their dreaded power play.

Hey! The Nucks PK is doing the business.

Then the Avs go on their dreaded power play. The Avs went off their dreaded power play. With a goal to gloat with.

Avs up 1-0.

Other than that goal...Marky was not letting in any others. And getting help out front too.

With the striped gift of extra PP time, the Avs outshot the Nucks only 11 to 9.

Period ends. Fortunately for us. We could get back to agonising over the TDL without the annoying distraction of a hockey game interrupting our focus on building a hockey roster in a single day.

Let’s invite Travis into our expert media scrutiny circle of trust.

Do you believe this guy? Talking sense. This isn’t the day for good sense - it’s about making up nonsense rumours and talking about nonsense hockey trades, not talking about a hockey game.

2nd Period

I know. It’s rude. If NM ran the league you bet they’d be no games on TDL day. Ok..maybe a few eastern (and Cali) teams might get a couple back-to-backs on the same day...but I digress.

NM doesn’t run the league. Only observes with great impartiality and perceptive acuity the frequent missteps and egregious policies of this pro hockey league that our team must endure.

Like playing a game on the TDL.

Reluctantly we return to the game. Here’s what was going on...

A minute in Jake takes a penalty. Big deal. It’s only his 3rd of the game. He’s just pushing the boundaries and keeping the zebras off the streets. He should get an award from the refs or something, not several minutes of solitary confinement.

The Avs go on their dreaded power play. The Avs went off their dreaded power play.

Hey! The Nucks PK is doing the business again.

Speaking of business...did you know the Canucks have 47 players under contract? Close to 50 which is the arbitrary number the league imposes as the limit. They claim it’s the same rule for all teams. But is it?

It’s a rule that favours all the cheapskate teams in the US with cheapskate billionaire owners. Imagine if NM ran the league...stop screaming for a moment. Now consider if we set Mr. A and his wallet free - we could sign 150 or 250 players, even 20 goalies if we wanted. We’d be the team holding all the cards on the TDL. Not Vegas.

Anyhow...we’re not here to listen to my swift, crushing method to win a Cup, we’re here to watch a period end so we can get back to the TDL business at hand.

Going to say the Nucks outplayed the Avs, because I can and the stats back me up by a huge margin - Nucks outshoot the Avs 9-8.

2nd period ends, finally. Without Marky going Softie and the tie is preserved. The special TDL trade results tie. Let’s let our NTC’d up tieless Hank put his thoughts into our thoughts via more internet media about the most important thoughts we can think on a day that had us thinking all kinds of thoughts that we can’t express in polite company - we have the internet to express those.

3rd Period

There’s more? What do they want us to do? It’s tough enough for the Nucks to play a full 60 minutes, they expect it will be any easier for us fans to watch? On TDL day fer cryin’ out loud.

It’s more back and forth - damn those Avs are fast - they’re used to playing a mile up...although last year they were more than a mile down in the standings.

Anyhow, Jake made a great power move into the zone and rang a shot off the post and in. Woo! All tied up!

Because the league doesn’t want a tie and piss off the Tradigentsia in such a critically important news cycle, they let play continue and that Canadian kid, MacKinnon, wheels out of his zone like he’s on skates and zooms down the wing and puts a hard shot on a soft Marky spot and into the net.

2-0 Avs. Not fair!

But at least we’re spared the annoyance of the Avs scoring on the PP in OT.

Or are we?

The Nucks, probably oxygen-starved at this point, are not interested in letting us get back to our TDL analytic psychoanalysis and interpretative psychosis.

With about a minute and half before we can really get on Twitter and set the universe straight, the Nucks, for probably the 1st time this season, score with the extra attacker. Dank scores from a bad angle made good. We’re not sure if he was the extra attacker. If so, then it counts as an extra goal and the game is tied.

But no, the refs rule it as a single comeback goal. That sucks, but could be worse, one of our extra attack players could fall down, lose the puck and MacKinnon scores an EN. And so... that’s what happened.

Game is out of reach. And chaos and fake debate is restored to the NHL twitterverse.

Nucks outshot the Avs 14-9 in the 3rd and 32-28 in the game. Avs were just lucky to squeak out the win. If it weren’t for Vanek failing to report for power play duty, the results could have been much different.

Sure, not his fault, but the Nucks have been building a culture of accountability and responsibility. Not playing just because you were traded to another team at another TDL doesn’t mean you give up on us because we gave up on you. That’s not accountability.

Anyhow...that waste of media airtime is behind us and there’s fresh media air to waste in the post TDL biopsies that will fill our heads with woulda/coulda/shoulda fever and the what-if flu.

Meanwhile back in the oxygen-deprived mile-high visitor’s locker room, Danny gives a way to go the other.

Our Jake the Penalty Brake, got 17:06 of ice-time and would have had more if not for the repeated solitary confinement punishments that somehow this league thinks will rehabilitate repeat offenders.

Marky played well, but for the honorary softie on the MacKinnon goal - Marky does not like those rude players skating fast towards him and then shooting even faster. I don’t either. He stopped 25 of 27 shots for a .926 SV% - a SV% that should be enough to win any game in this league - that’s not played on the TDL.

Over in the Green room...it was dark and airless. Already at the airport ready to return to civilised altitudes if not attitudes. But Green did say this...

Finally. That’s over with. Games at this time of the season can make us lose focus on the important things - like the games next season at this time of the season.

Back home for a humpday game against the freshly tanked-up Rags. Now there’s some TDL fodder we can devour in the gamethread. Tearing it down in NYC.

How far down will they go? Let’s decide that in 48 hours. We’ve got so much more to digest, regurgitate, postulate and expectorate from our own massive stockpile of bile, umbrage and unrequited picks. Just kidding. We didn’t give away any picks - save the venom for game night. The hockey game night. TDL night is over. Deal with it.

Enjoy the anal analysis tomorrow and a tremendously wicked Wednesday.