This past week has been all about winning - winning the rookie scoring race - winning all the games in Pennsylvania. WINNING recaps!
And....as some of my NY friends say...just visiting NJ is like winning the lottery - the bingo lottery they hold in hell when it freezes over and ices up so fast you can’t collect your winnings from...you know...the devils.
I don’t want to be indelicate and spoil what has been a happy joy joy sort of road trip so far. So I won’t. If you’re foolish enough to get your Nucks game recaps from other more legitimate sports media outlets than NM, I can’t protect you from stupid games that never should have been scheduled and their results that should never count or be recapped.
FULL DISCLOSURE: Watching a Devils game realtime can put me to sleep, so I PVR’d it. So I watched it later on the PVR. I still fell asleep. And dreamed that Brock had another 2 goal night and the Nucks won the game!
And that’s how the game ended. We win. Thanks for reading.
It’s Jersey on a Friday night during the most important American holiday of the year. Black Friday.
Most important consumer spending holiday. Because Murican marketing prowess is so potent, the American Thanksgiving Black Friday consumer tradition has infected Canada too. Canada’s NHL hockey teams, their players and fans.
We’re spent, the Canucks players spent and still the league wants us to be more spent. But we’re all spent out.
So the fans and players can only wait it out. And here’s what happened.
The puck was on the ice. For most of the period.
Not to be out-pucked-stared - Marky stared at the puck too. This is what he saw.
Granny was so excited to be in Jersey that he posed his excited puck staring face for the camera.
That was pretty much it. Marky stopped possibly one dangerous shot. Schnieds stopped a dangerous shot in close from Tanev. Stop laughing. It could haven been dangerous if it was a Brocket headed for the top corner instead of the goalie crest.
The Jersey Devils out shot the Nucks 10-9 - pretty much a tie on that stat - and the period ends the way it started. Dull 0-0 tie.
All tied up in the 2nd and the tension is palpable. The Amazon page isn’t refreshing the latest deal and you’re desperate to get the cart filled before something bad happens. Like a Taylor Hall goal on a bad clear from Marky behind the net and worse coverage by the new Edlerated line.
It’s 1-0 for Satan’s home team. And something bad has happened on the NVL Express.
No worries. It’s only a movie - and you can watch in 5 years on NetFlix when you’re bored watching a Devils game.
Cue the Comeback
With the V-Twins on the ice, Virt (it might have been Edler, but I’m saying it was Virt because this is my recap - go write your own) scoops up the puck behind the devious devils net and sends it over to Dank. Hank is in front of the net making crude Kes references with Cory. Dank realises his brother and his former teammate are distracted, sends a shot across the
bow crease and the puck deflects off Coleman’s skate and in. That’s how you get a goal on Cory on Black Friday. Distraction.
Cue the Feel-Good Moment
Tonight was "Hockey Fights Cancer Night" in the Prudential Center of the Dull Hockey Arts.
If you haven’t heard, Brian Boyle was diagnosed with chronic myelogenous leukemia during training camp and missed the first 10 games while undergoing treatment.
Because the Nucks are suckers for Feel-Good moments that hurt (them), they let Boyle score a power play goal. The crowd is happy. Boyle is happy. I’m happy it doesn’t take a Boyle hattie to make peeps happy in Jersey.
I’m not happy that the Nucks couldn’t distract Cory again for the tie. Instead, the sneaky little Devils get another goal. It’s Puck Devils 3 - Nucks Luck 1.
And the period that formerly belonged to us in PA is now playing second fiddle to the Devils music. It’s a horrible screeching sound since the Nucks numbers when coming back from behind in the turd are poopy.
Poopy chances of a comeback aren’t total crap, are they? No, not totally. Not when the super powered-up Nucks road power play gets their back into it. Bo gets high on Cory from down low - with an assist from Brock. Point streak intact.
We may not have won the game (coin toss) but we WON the trade. If Bo had potted a couple more on Cory, my narrative would be easier to play from behind with.
Oh, well.... It’s not like Nucks lost the game. They knew where it was at all times - just out of reach. Maybe, like many, they were spent after the frantic BF frenzy. Didn’t have the energy to put the game away in the 2nd period where Jersey couldn’t find it.
And weren’t enough minutes in the 3rd to capture a tie either. Sometimes I feel hockey is too strict a game. In horseshoes, 3-2 is close enough for a tie in many horse pucky leagues. Shots were 26-25 for the dirt devils - pretty much a tie. And two almost ties almost make a win! Yay (almost)!
The good news from this almost-a-win effort, is that Danny got a great BF deal on two points - puts him at 998. So close to being a grand achievement.
And Brock kept his point streak pointing in the extended direction. Marky got a .885 SV% which is almost good enough for a free drink in any Atlantic City casino.
The other bit of good news - there are no other teams in New Jersey to lose the season series to. NJ Devils are 2-0 against the Nucks this season. Pointy-sticked devils!
As is tradition when the win side-slips away from the Nucks into the media scrum, a Sedin is sent to the mic to atone for the team.
And our ever Green coach had this to say...
"It comes down to the little details to separate who wins and who losses." Coach Green gives his take on tonight's game. pic.twitter.com/0YVN5vavIh— Vancouver Canucks (@Canucks) November 25, 2017
I think Green is confident about still having one of the best road team records in the league.
And I’m confident enough to say: Screw you, jersey turnpikers!
Let’s leave the game’s boxcar stats behind and wing our way to MSG for rebounding success story time on Sunday. See you in the Neverland Express’s storied drinking lounge - listening to NM Sunday dinner drinking stories told by drunks sipping and slurping deeply from the Cup of Westy’s road-brewed Wine of Destiny.