WE ARE SO WINNING the CUP!
How is that? That’s a question that only Westy can answer. And he only answers questions when wrapped in a tropical storm served in sparkling margaritas with a twist of irony.
Let’s be real here. Do we expect to win every game on our inevitable Cup victory? Yes. And no. Doesn’t matter. What does matter is the Canucks are a team of destiny. And you don’t ask a destiny horse in the mouth. Or look in its mouth like a grumpy dentist from Delta. Or something.
The point is..before you distracted me with your needlessly distracting questions...the point is we won again last night. Clearly. Through
3 2 1.5 periods. However, because we can afford to be beneficent to former team members and since the obstructionist Sens style is not fair, we gave them a loser point. Or two. But, that’s not the point.
The point is we won the game fair and square. (2 periods is enough to know) And then gave Burrs a little homecoming gift.
Playing a little sloppy at home in the first in the first few games is a winning strategy 50% of the time as our season-to-date record proves. That’s how you know it’s a great strategy. It’s the game half full rather than the game half empty psycho fan test. Don’t make me make you take that test. Wait until at least the
Olympic All-Star break.
Because you have so many questions about the game and I have so few answers, let’s let me pick the questions.
What did I like this period? I liked seeing Marky robbing Burrs. Stopped, stoned and suffocating a sure goal from a turnover right in front of Markstrom. We love you Burrs, just not as much as you hoped. Until later.
What didn’t I like this period? I didn’t like Marky letting in a softy from way out in the outer bowl. That was the game right there as it turns out. Not a big deal, tho, because...we have a bigger destiny to fulfil.
What else did I like this period? I liked that our Norrris-winning* Tanev shot a laser past a Vanek-screened Anderson to tie the game.
*That's Norrris with an added R. The 3R Norrris is an exclusive trophy given in secret ceremony that no one has ever seen, because it's secret.
1 goal in 2 games! Tanev! At this pace he’ll probably pot another 50 or 60. In secret, because he’s just that kind of non-show-offy guy.
What else didn’t I like this period? I didn’t like that Burrs, all pumped up on NM Burrbuzz, wanted to make a big impact. A big impact that could have meant IR fever for Stecher. Fortunately getting slammed into the open door policy at the Sens bench is not worse than getting stifled by their closed ice policy.
What else did I like? I liked that they gave Burrs a great tribute and a heartfelt standing ovation rather than a sure goal.
This is where we win the game. Within the first few minutes, Granlund and Dorsett break through the obstructionist Sens D. A quick pass to Dorsett and Double D scores. At least it should have been a goal, but Anderson continues the Sens obstructionist ways and stops the puck easily. Still should have been a goal. While we’re happy to promote the Burrows never-quit narrative, it’s only fair that NHL goalies diminish the hands-of-stone storyline that Double D has to carry around his surgically enhanced neck in NM comments.
No matter. If the Nucks can’t get a quid pro quo goal from the opposing goalie, they’re happy to score the old fashioned way. Screening the goalie. On a set play (set play? this early in the season?). From the faceoff the Nucks gained control of the puck, sent a pass out to Vanek who fired a shot past a visually-challenged Anderson. Vanek our new redirect and SO specialist. Thankfully we didn’t need to test the SO hero theory because that was the period winning goal from a nice screen from Hank.
Final Score: Canucks 2 Sens 1
Thank you for reading.
But WAIT! There’s more!
Why? We proved we could hold a lead going in the 3rd against one of the most offensively offensive powerhouses in the league last Saturday. What is the point of proving it again and again in every game!?!
But I digress. Again. Just remembered our beneficent Cup destiny allows the Canucks to give a point away to worthy opponents that have AMFB on their roster. So in the spirit of breaking spirits, glasses and winning streaks, the Nucks got sloppy behind their own net and let Bobby Ryan make a cross ice feed to an unmolested Dzingel who roofed it over Marky.
And that’s how the game ended. It was a tie.
But, then the NHL forced them to finish playing the next 15 minutes of the period. Tyrants! The Canucks outplayed the suffocating Sens through most of the 3rd and were rewarded with a chance to shine in OT. Overtime? Already? In the 2nd freakin’ game of the season!?!
Ok, fine. We’ll play this a little longer. After a few tentative minutes with some back and forth chances, our very own Killer B stole the puck from yet another obstructionist Sens player and rushed down the ice on a breakaway to put the game away. And that’s how the game ended. Sven scored.
Or did he? Again that stubborn Anderson stopped the puck using what seemed to me illegal goalie gear. Those pads are enormous and flick out to stop the puck like some sort of AI-assisted robo-pad. Have you seen Anderson? I’m not saying he’s a robo-goalie, but he could be an early prototype.
And so OT was decided. It’s a tie! Again. That should be enough hockey this early in the season for anyone. But not for the Sens. Every game they’ve played this season, and it’s quite a few - more than two or one - they have lost in the skillz session. No worries. We got this. Our secret SO Vanekular shooting weapon.
Shootout (#fake period)
Granny scores on the first shot in the shooting galleria phase. We win!
But, we already have a vital point towards our Cup account, why be greedy? So they let the Sens take a shot on Marky. And fail. Can we just stop now? No, seems not. The number 3 was not on our side. All night. Sens get one past Marky on their 3rd try and then get another in the 27th round. Or so. I can’t recall. Also can’t recall our sure-thing Thomas the Terror of Shootouts scoring. Memory is a weird thing - often in conflict with expectation.
And so the game ended the way it started. The Canucks are undefeated! In regulation. And overtime. That’s 2 out of 3 winning statements right there.
The Senators peppered Marky with 42 shots. As we learned last season that is not the high number stat to boast about. The Nucks put a more modest and respectful 28 shots on Anderson. If he wasn’t wearing his servo-assisted robo-goalie suit the outcome and the mood of NM would be much different.
Here’s how the media portrayed the game: (Note: even they were bored with the shootout too)
That was 3 periods too many for me, but the Canucks have come to play this season, even if it wasn’t in all parts of this game. Yet, it’s early and a stoooopid #fakeskillz loss only stings for a day.
Thursday we have our meet and greet session with Winterpeg. Let’s keep their frosty season going and our grand destiny unfolding just as Westy said it would.