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Canucks At Coyotes Preview: Abandon Your Posts! Flee For Your Lives!

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Time 6:00 PM PST
TV Sportsnet Pacific
H2H Last 5
3-2 Coyotes
Last Meeting
7-1 Canucks Dec.22/14
The Enemy Five For Howling Scoring Leaders H. Sedin: 15-44-59
Ekman-Larsson: 17-14-31

Oh look! Another team tanking for McDavid. We are so fucked! More on that after da stats:


Canucks
CATEGORY
Coyotes
36-24-3 SEASON RECORD 20-37-7
75 Points 47
6th Conference Position 13th
Lost 1
Streak LOST 10
6-4-0 Last 10 Games
0-10-0
0.96 (22) 5 on 5
0.59 (30)
18.2 (14) Power Play %
21.4 (6)
85.8 (4) Penalty Kill %
77.4 (27)
47.8 (26) Faceoff Winning %
52.3 (5)
.759 (7)
Winning % When Scoring First
.417 (30)

The Coyotes are only 1 point ahead of the Oilers and 4 ahead of the Sabres in the battle for last spot in the NHL. Just to put a staple in their failure of a season, the dogs traded away Antoine Vermette, Keith Yandle, Zbynek Michalek at the trade deadline and got younger punks and picks in return. Five For Howling grades the Coyotes' Deadline performance here. On top of that, Arizona has lost Boedker and Hanzal Panzal (fuck him anyway) for the season. So what does their roster look like now?

LW C RW
Martin Erat
Martin Erat
Kyle Chipchura
Kyle Chipchura
Shane Doan
Shane Doan
Tobias Rieder
Tobias Rieder
Mark Arcobello
Mark Arcobello
Sam Gagner
Sam Gagner
Lauri Korpikoski
Lauri Korpikoski
Craig Cunningham
Craig Cunningham
David Moss
David Moss
Tye McGinn
Tye McGinn
Joe Vitale
Joe Vitale
B.J. Crombeen
B.J. Crombeen
Defensive Pairings
Oliver Ekman-Larsson
Oliver Ekman-Larsson
Michael Stone
Michael Stone
John Moore
John Moore
Connor Murphy
Connor Murphy
Klas Dahlbeck
Klas Dahlbeck
Andrew Campbell
Andrew Campbell

Mike Smith is likely to start for the Dogs, wearing a throwback mask "honoring" the Coyotes' original logo. Alice Cooper is a huge Coyotes fan? Huh. Well Cooper and his music sucks anyway. Anyway, it's throwback night for all the players to honor their jersey roots:

Hahahaha. I think I have to be from Arizona to understand how THAT was supposed to appeal to Coyotes fans. Sweet baby jesus. Jeremy Roenick likes it though. So it really must suck. Maybe they should be called the Arizona Peyotes. At least then I'd understand.

The damned Dogs have lost 10 in row! This is Toronto kinda bad, almost. They have not won a home game since January 8. Since that date they have a 4-17-3 record.

The Coyotes suck so bad.......that the Canucks will lose to them. Yup. Time to abandon ship, Canucks fans. It's gonna get ugly from here. Clearly, Eddie Lack and Jacob Markstrom manning the pipes is gonna spell disaster once again for the Canucks in the stretch run of the season. Where are all you Ryan Miller haters now? The Canucks won the game against the Islanders 4-0 in which Miller was injured. They won the next game 2-1 against Boston with Lack in net. Then: 1 win and 2 losses, scoring 11 goals and allowing 17 in those 3 games with a Lack/Markstrom combo. It's not just the goaltenders. The team defence has been an atrocity. So that makes you believe that we really need Edler and Tanev back? KAMAN! We were doing fine without them. Even with them, the team defence sucked. This is the by-product of management wanting the more anti-Torts offensive game. Yea, I really do find it damned offensive. Far too fucking many odd-man rushes against all season long, relying too heavily on goaltending as a result. Play some defense FFS. That, and stop it with the catastrophic turnovers.

Did you know the Canucks have not strung together 3 consecutive wins since January 19? They kinda like that 2 wins in a row and then shitting the bed kinda trend. Drives me fucking nuts because of the shitty efforts in some of these losses.

VIDEO

Watch the Canucks absolutely destroy the Dogs in the last meeting (oh! Miller was in net!):

Hank was mic'd up last game:

Congrats on the 901 points, Hanky. That puts you in the top 100 in NHL history. a

This game preview has been brought to you by Denethor:

Tank Canucks Tank!