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The Canucks lose 4-3 to the Blues.

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The Canucks lose their first in regulation this year after sleeping at the wheel for most of the game.

It's a long night when a guy named Bortuzzo scores.
It's a long night when a guy named Bortuzzo scores.
Anne-Marie Sorvin-USA TODAY Sports

The St Louis Blues came to town and now we need to disinfect the whole damn place. Before tonight the Blues had only 3 points in the last 5 games they played at Rogers Arena. Willie D. decided to whip Canuck fans into a frenzy by putting out these lines in warmup.

Dorsett on Line 2. I can imagine Tony G. wishing he had column space for that.

First Period

Good flow to the game and the Canucks do a good job of getting their body in front of shots. All four the Nucks lines are moving the puck and getting chances. Mr Sutter leads a 4 on 1 breakout and tries to pass it to Dorsett for a tip in. Sutter to Dorsett….I had to type it out again just to see it if it was real. Needless to say it didn’t end in a goal. I think the rule if there is a 4 on 1 or 3 on 1, is that the shooter just treats it like a breakaway and shoots the puck. A couple minutes after that the Blues open the scoring.

I had to watch this clip a few times to see where the 5th Canuck was when the goal was scored. Oh…way out at center ice. Nice change. Bo may want to pay better attention to where his man is next time. The Blues are given a Christmas PP after a phantom high stick by Burrows on Upshall.. Maybe Burrows’s hands just that quick that he knocked Upshall in the head with anyone noticing…except the ref, which means the ref is a fucking warlock if he saw it.

With 4 minutes left the Nucks went on the PP after Steve Ott played lumberjack. I forgot Ott played on St Louis. I should have remembered that much like the Sith, mouthbreathers also come in pairs (looking at you Backes). Nothing came of that PP….or the period.

Second Period

4 minutes into the period and the only good chance so far was a Horvat/ Dorsett 2 on 1. And Bo did the right thing and shot the puck, which Allen saved and Dorsett couldn’t corral the rebound. I like 4th line Dorsett…..2nd line Dorsett, not so much.

Alex Edler tried the old up the gut pass which was intercepted by Tarasenko, who passed it to Statsny and put into the back of the net by Steen. We should have all seen this coming, as Steen feeds on the Canucks like Zandberg at a rum tasting.

As I pointed out before, St louis has some mouthbreathers and David Backes lived up to the kind term as he took a questionable pass by McCann with his elbow. Luca Sbisa stepped to have a few words with Backes and received a penalty for doing so. Thankfully local boy Troy Brouwer did the Nucks a favor and interfered with Cracknell. The Canucks then went the PP, which has not looked effective in the past few games. It was not effective now

And then the Blues decided to show a little speed as the Nucks got caught flat footed in the offensive zone. Steen and Tarasenko decided to let a defensemen named Bortuzzo score.

I want to pack up and go sleep but the game is only half over and I think someone might notice if I make up the rest of this recap. Dorsett is also a little pissed and decides that after missing on two chances of his own that he will fight Bortuzzo. This was actually a good fight….someone is going to ask for a definition of good fight. Daniel Sedin takes a holding to try and kill any momentum from the fight, but Brandon Sutter is able to break out of the defensive zone and then forgets how to pass and scores. See Brandon….passing is for suckers.

With 1:30 left in the period the Nucks received a 4 minutes PP after Sutter got caught by a Tarasenko high stick. Virtanen got his first taste of being with the Sedins and spent his time playing whack-a-Bouwmeester. The PP goes into the third.

Third Period

I want to start the period with this.

The Canucks are missing the big shot on the PP. Edler has broken a stick on almost every PP, of and he likes pulling an "Ehrhoff" and shoot wide of the net. It’s kind of annoying. The Nucks move the puck around get a few shots off. And the PP unit of the future hot the ice for 30 seconds ( Virt, McCann, and Hutton) but no love on the PP. The refs gave the Canucks another chance to improve on their 1-17 PP this season with 12:45 left in the third. The Canucks spit on that chance.

The Brightside of a game like this, Jake Virtanen getting comfortable. He drove to the net and just missed a tap in and then drove into the zone again and created a shot. Miller played pretty good tonight and stopped Steen on a breakaway.

Matt Bartkowski has been a Canuck for a minute but he seems to know what to do when the Canucks are losing….take a penalty. Hey, the Nucks scored on the last PK.

Edler and Tanev played Abbott and Costello on defense and Kyle Brodziak benfitted from it to make it 4-1. Jared McCann brought back a little bit of hope for Canuck fans with his second of the year. And get this…Sutter got an assist.

And then the Canucks pulled Miller with over 2 minutes left. There was a lot of scrambling and a couple of empty net shots that were missed by the Blues. And then the cruelest twist of them all, Daniel Sedin scores with 28 seconds left to wreck my score prediction that had the correct scorer as well. Thanks Daniel.

In the end the Canucks lost 4-3. The urgency of the last 2 minutes needed to start 5 minutes earlier. The Blues break their curse in Vancouver and the Nucks lose their first regulation game of the year.

This sums it up.