Good morning, everyone. Thank fuck you cannot smell my breath today. Coffee and curry? Christ, someone's in trouble. Anyways, we've got some fake season news, little hope for a full 82 game REAL NHL season and more! Lets get at it!
>> Game six of the fake Canucks season has come and gone, now we're fortunate enough to have Wyatt "Goin for a dart" Arndt and J "Insert NWO reference" Bowman host fake sports center together.
>> Ben "The Ghost Face Killa" Kuzma shapped with Dan Hamhuis on how there is little hope for an 82 game season.
>> Brad "I will never drink another Zima" Ziemer says even if the NHL lockout ends, Canucks prospect Nicklas Jensen is likely to stay in Sweden.
That looks like that's all for Canucks news. Shit.
The Other Guys:
>> Obama shappin' NHL? Yeah, well it happened.
>> Denis Potivin cried into his pillow for hours after he found out about the Islanders relocating to Brooklyn.
>> Tomas Kabrle has left his Czech league team and returned to North America. He signed a one month contract. Seems odd.
>> Jonas "It's Yonas, not Jonas, asshole" Enroth has signed with a third division Swedish league team.
>> And just as fast as a Czech league loses a player, it gains one. Martin Hanzel is headed overseas.
That's all for me today, everyone. Enjoy your days and never start it with spicy curry. What the fuck was I thinking?!
Thanks for reading!