Bob, a Canadian, is walking down the street with a case of beer under his arm.
His friend Doug sees him walking down the street and stops him to say hi. "Hey Bob! Whacha get the case of beer for?"
"I got it for my wife, eh" answers Bob.
"Oh!" exclaims Doug, "Good trade."
Closer and closer we get to hockey! Can you hear that? The sound of an Aarom Rome giveaway? Can you smell that? The smell of Keith Ballard's finely pressed suit in the press box? Can you see that? The MCL and ACL separating in Marco Sturm's knees? Hockey is slowly inching it's way back into our hearts, and I for one, can't wait to update my Aaron Rome jokes! With that being said, let's look at some news from around the NHL and about your Vancouver Canucks!Vancouver Canuck News:
- Do you find yourself getting a snack from the fridge and wishing someone was screaming "He's going for the peanut butter......IT'S GOOD!!!"? Do you find yourself faking out your girlfriend with a quick step left then spinning right and nailing the empty milk carton into the garbage can, wishing you had someone screaming "FOR THREE.........GOOD!!!!!!!!!!". Well then you'll be happy to know that ex-Vancouver Grizzlies announcer Al Murdoch will be splitting PA duties with John Ashbridge next year for the Vancouver Canucks. No word yet on whether Stu Jackson will be 'recommended' (read: forced down our throats) for a team job. [Canucks.com]
- Been dying for a cliche riddled article from Daniel Sedin? Man, do I have you covered. The Province has a breathtaking article in which we go from cliches such as "Have to get back on that horse" to "Give it your best" to "The hunger is stronger than ever." If you're not in a coma by the end of this article then you are a stronger man than me. [The Province]
- Waiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit. You want MORE Daniel Sedin? Can you guys tell that Daniel was the only new player to come back to town yesterday? I imagine the local media saw Daniel, glanced at each other, than just took off running. Well, lightly jogging. OK, walking while trying to finish off the donuts from the media food table. OK, screaming from afar while flinging vegetables at Daniel. Daniel gives the same interview but this time he talks about Brad Marchand's SIX PUNCHES OF DOOM. Does Daniel promise revenge? Does Daniel take a blood oath and death pact until his revenge is complete? Or does Daniel give a bland response?? Read to find out! [Vancouver Sun]
NHL News and Notes:
- Ready for huge debate on the role of fighting in hockey? With Belak's recent passing, and with three deaths occurring in such a short time frame, you just knew the debate would flare up. My solution? If a fight breaks out, players have to put on those fat sumo suits and battle it out. Would Wellwood even require a suit you ask? Well, that's what Shanahan's rule committee is for. [CBC.CA]
- Stamkos and Roenick share a loving bro moment as they sit on a couch and discuss video games. My favorite part of the interview? Stamkos defending the Tampa market by describing the nights when sometimes 21,000 people would show up and blow the roof off. Also known as the playoffs. Also, Stamkos plays Call of Duty. I bet you anything he has run around, ducking and stabbing me from long distance. You bitch. [Montreal Gazette]
- TSN has all the latest news on the broadcasting rights for the Winnipeg Jets. Or as we call it in Vancouver "Oh that team that we always beat in the playoffs. That's nice." [TSN.CA]
- Fake Jets jerseys were nabbed at the border. Apparently China makes lowly knockoffs of jerseys? Was anyone aware of this? Apparently this happens. Luckily they were stopped at the border, and the crime of someone actually wearing a Jets jersey was stopped in its tracks. The Jets promise the real jerseys will come with "quite a splash" that will show the stark difference between the fake jerseys and the real ones. I hope this means the rumor is true, and that the Jets jerseys have the nude picture of the Queen on them. [Toronto Sun]
Off the Stanchion Link:
A throwback to the some of the ugly jerseys worn for charities: [Click Me. Now.]
Video of the Day:
It's Thursday. And as you can see, I can't left align my paragraphs anymore due to that picture of the Queen. Awesome. So let's celebrate with a funny non hockey video. Many of you will have seen this, but for those of you who haven't, please check out two of the best pranks of all time.
Prank War 6: The Infamous Yankee Prankee (via collegehumor)
Prank War 7 - The Half Court Shot (via collegehumor)
Stanchion Gif Special:
I am very proud of this one.