My good friends, let us bow our heads and pray:
Dear God and/or whoever is up there,
Hello. Are you there? It's us. Vancouver Canuck Fans. It's hockey-related. Ice hockey? Do you get Versus? No? We don't either.
Anyway, we're the ones you have mocked so powerfully over a few decades now. After this, this, this, this, this, this, this and yes this we've come to understand you. Impressive! If getting us humble was your goal, consider us knowingly served.
However, today we come to you with another in a long line of spiritual missives or, if you will "hail marys". What's that? You don't like puns either? Fuc...what, no cursing either? Tough room.
You see the management of our fair team has spent over half a year bringing this to this. They tell us that, along with a healthy this, it'll all help get us closer to this. Sadly we've heard something similar before and, as you've shown us all too willingly, it usually ends in this. And that is followed up with a summertime of this.
So then you know this is going to start tonight. Whether we like it or not, we've put a lot of faith in this to deliver what this, this and this amongst others couldn't do. Why he picked a road game against a team where things like this happen I don't know. You must know because you're you. The kings of kings. Hell of a title by the way - 'hell' counts as a curse? Fine, sorry again - but have you seen how your other Kings are doing?
So today we come to you asking that you loosen the vice-like death lock you have on our team just a bit to let us sniff, sip and hang around that feeling of success. It can start tonight with this new look team. We also know it could end just as quickly if something like this, this or this were to happen.
Pretty please don't let that happen. And, at the very least, in the long run we ask that this new chapter won't end like this.
We ask this in your name or whatever name you want us to say.
Thank you. Sorry about the cursing.
PS - Isn't it time Iginla got a groin injury? For real, what's the hold up? Pay it forward.