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Game Two Drunk-Live-Angry Blog

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8:33 PM - Drinking has started...I need to pregame a bit to stomach what I am sure will be another half-hearted Versus production.

By the way, I know the image is aimed for the Texas college football crowd, but fuck it. I like it anyway.

8:59 PM - Bill Clement just pondered outloud if the Canucks have any gas left in the tank. I didn't hear him ask the same thing about Dallas; then again, I'm doing my best to not pay attention to him. So it begins...

9:04 PM - Well, there's Strader and Beezer again. I immediately drink because seeing them kills me a little inside. At this rate, I'll be dead before the end of the first.

9:05 PM - Beezer said resiliency! The favorite buzzy wuzzy Versus word is back! And I drink...

9:09 PM - Is Brian Engblom real? Seriously, I don't think he's human. And, from his commentary, he thinks Vancouver basically sucks. Ugh...

9:11 PM - OK, it starts. And they score in 30 seconds...christ. But hey, guess what? They couldn't do that in 4 OT's. So eat shit.

9:14 PM - And Cowan puts the Stars on the man advantage. To say this game isn't starting correctly is an understatement.

9:16 PM - Beezer is in love with Dallas. Someone send a hallmark card quick. Good to see the Sedins killing penalties.

9:18 PM - Strader and Beezer both mention that Smoke got a lucky goal in the first game. Objectivity, gosh I miss you. Come back...

9:20 PM - Sopel gives one away, Beezer comments that Canucks are out of rhythm and the Stars nearly score again. This is fun! I would love to see Pyatt do something tonight. Hansen looked decent cycling with Bulis though, so there's promise. Right?

9:23 PM - Jesus, Sopel can't even stick up for Luongo without Strader taking a dig at Vancouver. This is getting somewhat absurd...Canucks need to score to even it up, get the crowd into it and shut these Versus guys up.

9:25 PM - Mitchell takes a high sticking penalty. Awesome. Versus craps out for about a minute of the powerplay...not bad, looking at black was better then watching Dallas tee off on Luongo. Beezer is still extolling virtues on Dallas...

9:30 PM - Vancouver has done nothing in ten minutes of hockey. That's incredible.

9:31 PM - Dallas takes a high sticking call. Now the Canucks will have to do something, like shoot the fucking puck.

9:32 PM - Sopel gives it away again. Not that I am counting. And Pyatt takes a goaltender interference call because Turco decided to take a ballerina lesson in his own crease. Fuck. And, GUESS who defends Turco? OK, I'll stop pointing out the obvious.

9:33 PM - Sydor takes a tripping call. The Sedins are seriously unreal...this series may just become those two and Luongo vs Dallas.

9:35 PM - Smoke takes a call? What the fuck? Sydor's was debatable to begin with...

9:37 PM - It'll be a small miracle if Vancouver gets out of this period down by just one goal.

9:39 PM - Vigneault may need to start juggling these lines. Sedins aside, I haven't seen any sustained pressure all period. 12-8 shots in Dallas' favor so far.

9:41 PM - Brendan Morrow is mic'd up. From what I can tell he's a bitch. And then some Star takes Luongo's mask off? Where is the emotion here? I can't believe Beezer, as a goalie, has no problem with this.

9:46 PM - Smoke missed a blast that was probably the best chance of the period. Baby steps...

9:47 PM - OK, I'm sorry. Fuck
Vanbiesbrouck...look you jackass, you're the commentator. That means you comment on both sides, good and bad. I fully recognize that Vancouver was weak in that period, but that doesn't give the red light to basically say the Stars are the second coming of christ either. If the Canucks were taking similar runs at Turco, you'd be squealing like a school girl. So can the shit and try and be a professional.

OK...

The period is over. With just a 1-0 deficit, it's a small victory. Vigneault has to earn his paycheck now. Dallas is faster, hitting and basically doing what they want to Luongo. Work your magic Alain. I'll be back for the second...Versus has to be turned off now.

10:06 PM - Bethany is liveblogging the Sharks/Preds...she may be suffering too, go show some love.

10:07 PM - Motherfucker, they score in the first minute again? I have nothing positive to say at all. Vancouver isn't even remotely interested in playing this game as far as I can tell.

10:09 PM - Isn't it about now a fight, a massive hit or, shit I don't know, a break in the time space continuum would be appropriate? I appreciate that Smith is targeting Ott...

10:12 PM - Canucks really need to cash in on this man advantage. Versus WILL NOT stop kissing Dallas ass. Please please please please...force them to recognize the Canucks are acually on the ice. I'll pay you in whiskey. Promise. Cross my heart.

10:16 PM - Nazzy takes a hooking call. There the advantage goes. And I drink more...I'm sorry Mike's liver, the Canucks don't want to play tonight and you'll pay in spades as a result.

10:20 PM - Zubov is a "classy" player because he slashed Morrison's stick. Anyone want to explain the jump in logic on that comment?

10:24 PM - BOB BEERS interviews Rick Boweness. You should remember Bob as the idiot from game one. His comments were priceless...nothing gold so far tonight, but I have faith in you Bob to give me a gem before the game is over.

10:28 PM - Dallas takes to their 6th powerplay of the night. I'm sorry folks, I have nothing positive to say. The ice looks nice. There, how's that?

10:31 PM - So it took 32 minutes for Vigneault to put Naslund with the Sedins....OK. Canucks draw a key powerplay while Versus shows Burrows being crushed in game one. In case you were curious.

10:33 PM - Oh my, is that a sense of urgency I see in the Canuck game? Briefly...they showed signs of life which is promising, but I wonder if it's too late. Dallas is going to clog the middle in the third and lay back so the Canucks need to keep this going. I hate to ask: anyone seen Pyatt tonight?

10:39 PM - Fuck it takes Hansen of all people to awaken the offense? The post shot sounded nice, I have no idea who shot it because Versus is, well, Versus. 90 seconds, do some damage.

10:40 PM - Why does anyone pass the puck to Mitchell in the offensive zone? You're better off just passing it to the opposition defensemen and hoping for a fuckup.

10:41 PM - Permit me to go where Versus won't - Naslund is playing well. The fact he's sacrificing his body, making great plays up ice and giving it his all shift to shift is awesome to see. Keep him with the Sedins and doubleshift them in the third. Don't give Turco/Versus the pleasure of a shutout.

10:45 PM - Guess who has played the LEAST amount of minutes in the game up to this point on both teams? Your Tommi Santala. Smith, Hansen and Linden follow him up with the fewest amount of minutes. Call me crazy, but maybe you should use them. The game is certainly not going the way you want it to Alain, so why not use the kids who have something to prove, the warrior Canuck who's been here before and Santala who, well, spells his name with an "i"? C'mon!

10:55 PM - Versus just showed an Arkansas tourism commercial. I know, I didn't realize there w
ere any people who thought of using their hard earned to spend their precious free time in that state either. Not sure whether to laugh or cry at that one. No no, I'll laugh.

11:01 PM - Ugh, everytime there is a point shot it's somehow Mitchell shooting it. Salo needs to spend some time with Willie on the plane to Dallas.

11:04 PM - haha...they just showed Nonis in his box basically losing his shit. To who, I don't know. But maybe he has the Versus feed too. I feel your pain Dave, may I suggest whiskey?

11:07 PM - Wow, the refs are now out of control. Sedin, I think Henrik, gets a phantom call to yank the Canucks off a powerplay. Nice, very nice. Vigneault had a funny response though. Seriously, that's all I got folks. It's been that bad a night.

11:12 PM - I am at the point where I'd love just one goal. Don't let these guys think they can just walk into GM Place and take a game so convincingly.

11:19 PM - Dallas gets a bench minor for a delayed line change. I know I've said it before, but this a gift and if the Canucks want anything out of this game, it's now.

11:25 PM - Mitchell jumps up in the offensive rush and, shockingly, doesn't score. He's a double edged sword so far.

11:29 PM - Versus has made this the Turco show. And, with a break in play, they started talking about Beezer's career. It's hard to blame them at this point...the Canucks haven't played this game from the drop of the puck in the first. At this point, just start sending messages. Sunday better be an entirely different night or the regular season effort was all for nothing.

11:33 PM - And...Luongo is pulled. Sure, just give them the 3-0 win and let the media crucify the Canucks like they're Don Imus until Sunday. Sure, why not?

11:35 PM - Turco just tried to shoot it into the empty net. How much worse can this get? Messier running onto the ice and scoring?

11:37 PM - OK, everyone gets an F tonight. NO ONE showed up tonight; where's passion, isn't this the playoffs? Game one must have taken a lot more out of this team then Dallas. Luongo made some good saves, but looked shaky in the first. The Sedins were forced to the perimeter all night. Naslund tried to pull this team forward, but no one joined him. The defensive coverage was not great. Sopel was awful. Pyatt was no where. No supporting offensive support or pressure. They basically handed Turco his FIRST shutout ever in the post season. Beezer essentially just thanked the entire Dallas starting lineup.

This was honestly the worst of both worlds: the Canucks didn't come to play at an elevated level at all and Versus was all too willing to pucker up to some Dallas ass. And before I get shit from anyone, a friend of mine who is far from a Canuck fan chimed in tonight and agreed with me that the coverage was terrible. That's all I need.

Forget tonight Canuck fans. Sunday is a new day. It's a 3 win series now and our team will be rested and angry. Anger goes a long way (see my entire blogging life). This isn't over yet.