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THINGS YOU MAY HEAR AROUND THE NHL THIS SEASON..

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  • Belfour to Auld: "Hey Alex, can you lend me 20 bucks? I lost my wallet at the beach party last night. C'mon man..20 bucks and I'll let you play goal tonight!"
  • Patrick Lalime (Black Hawks): "F..k it, these guys suck! These guys Ashlee Simpson suck! And I thought the Blues were bad!"
  • Jay McKee: "Somebody trashed my hotel room Nagano-style last night. Was it you Tkachuk? Guerin, it MUST have been you!"
  • Tony Amonte: "I can't believe it, I'm getting paid 1.85 million to play on the fourth line! This is paradise! Oh shit, here comes Sutter, please don't fire me Darryl, please don't! I have a family to support! I'll hit the net with my shots, I promise!"
  • Lemaire to Gaborik: "So Marian how do you like your paycheck?" Gaborik, jumping up and down yells: "I love it! Marian happy Marian happy!!! Oh SHIT!!"
    "What's wrong?!" inquires Lemaire. "I just pulled my groin."
  • The Sedins: "Hey coach, we know Naslund sucks this year, and that we're out-manned because Nonis couldn't sign anymore players, but we just can't play 5 shifts in a row like that anymore, ok?"
  • Roberto Luongo, dancing on a table top at Hooters in Vancouver: "Balalala LA BAMBA!"
  • Eric Lindros: "Hey Mike, you got any Tylenol? Jere patted me on the head after I scored and now I have a headache!"
  • Mogilny barges into Lamoriello's office with a tommy gun and says: "Say hello to my little Russian friend!" RATATATATATATATATAT
  • Sundin, tired of Jeff O'Neil's lousy play: "Oh yeah Jeff? If you're so good, then how come the Hurricanes won the Cup the year after they traded you, huh? "
    O'Neil: (sobbing) "Oh yeah? Well........shut up Mats! Just shut up! Waaaaahhhh!!!"
  • If you walk into the Habs dressing room this year, you'll witness an IA Meeting, as in Injuries Anonymous. "Hi, my name is Saku, and I have a problem."
    "Hi Saku...."