What do the Canucks have in common with Motley Crue? Nothing really, but Motley Crue has a song called the same old situation, which I can only assume is about the frequency in which they contracted gonorrhea in the 80's and early 90's and the Canucks are stuck in the same old situation of winning, then losing a few. It's a real motherfucker.
Morning, everyone! I hope your pillows didn't take too much of a beating from all of the tears of anger you let into them last night after the Canucks lost to the Minnesota Wild. Either way, we've got some Canucks news, some other news and probably nothing in between. Still patting myself on the back for working a gonorrhea reference into the Morning Buzz. Lets get at it!
>> Today I'm opening up with one of the best cuts of shap from the Godfather of shap himself, Tony Gallagher. Here is the Canucks Hat Trick according to Tony. Also from Gallagher, he talks about the Canucks tanking and playing a waiting game for next season.
>> Ben Kuzma has finally returned all of my Nintendo games and they are in 78% mint condition. He also talks about the buzz around the Canucks turning sour with last nights 3-1 loss to the Minnesota Wild. Also from Ben "Metroid had a crack in the back and a chip in the game when you fucking lent it to me" Kuzma The Provies Nightly Awards.
>> Quite possibly one of the better looking, non-bearded guest posts to the Legion of Blog is back with another guest post. I'll give you a hint: It's the Plus/Minus of the week and it's done by someone we'll call Mitch D. No, wait, that's too obvious. We'll call him M. Dyck. Yeah, that'll work.
That's all for the Canucks this morning, why don't we see what those other assholes are up to?
The Other Guys:
>> When it rains it fucking pours, or at least it does on Tampa Bay Lightning captain Vincent Lecavalier who is out a little while longer with what appears to be a broken foot.
>> If you think the Canucks can't score and have a hard time as a fan watching the games and getting into them, you should try being a Phoenix Coyotes fan. No, this has nothing to do with the NHL keeping them in a place where hockey may or may not belong, but it's about the Coyotes not being able to score a goal in THREE STRAIGHT GAMES.
>> I'm not going to advocate illegal hits ,but if your Matt Stajan of the Calgary Flames, how many fucking times do you skate through the middle of the ice or across the fucking blue line with your head down? Stajan almost had his knees taken out last night and Flames coach Bob Hartley said it's one of the dirtiest he's seen. Judge for yourself.
>> I'll end on this one here today, but Chicago Blackhawks forward Marian Hossa's apparent upper-body injury isn't that bad. I wonder what Chicago's concussion protocol is like. "Hos, can you see? Yeah. Are your ears bleeding? No. Ok. Stop high fiving yourself, licking the Indian head logo on the wall and get back out there and score some goals!"
That's all for me today, folks. Enjoy the sun while it's still here, because like herpes, the sunshine is not forever. Just ask my pal John.