Let's Talk Again: A Year Later
by Kent Basky on Feb 8, 2012 11:12 AM PST
in Nation-Building
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It's amazing the difference a year makes, isn't it? A year ago I was here talking to you about my struggles with depression, taking advantage of the Let's Talk initiative sponsored by Bell Canada to get people to end the silence about dealing with the painful struggle of those that suffer from depression, as well as the people who are directly affected by it: family, friends and coworkers.
I believe to this day that opening up to you all was a huge step in my recovery, a cathartic release even. I also spoke about a player near and dear to our hearts, Rick Rypien, and the struggles he was facing at the time. I suggested that it was in fact depression that he was suffering from, and while hindsight shows us that the personal leaves he took from the team were in fact that, all we had was speculation. I hate that so many of us were right, and not a day has gone by since that awful summer afternoon when we got the word about Ryp, that I don't think about him and wish that somehow he could have gotten through this. But it was his refusal to stay silent that provides the inspiration, more important than ever, that silence about depression, whether yours or someone you love's is wrong. So let's talk, shall we?
A few months after this event, I had progressed enough in my treatment that the severe anxiety I felt was under control enough, and I was able to represent Nucks Misconduct at the Stanley Cup Finals. It was the biggest thrill of my life, next to my kids being born. It wasn't just because I was able to achieve this dream, but also such a huge step personally, to go from days where I couldn't even leave the house, to being jammed into the insanity of Media Day, surrounded by hundreds of people. I would not have been able to do this just a few short months before.
We Canucks fans are often the butt of cruel jokes, and we've faced the kind of unimaginable heartbreak over the last 4 years that would cripple other fan bases. We've had to say goodbye to players far before their time, not to mention the soul-wrenching loss to the Bruins in game 7. And that's why the loss of Rick Rypien hurt even more. We were already vulnerable, those wounds fresh in our minds not just of seeing a foe raise the cup in our rink, as well as the pain that lingered from the tragic death of Luc Bourdon. The unimaginable horror of the news that Rypien had lost his battle with the demons of depression, followed by former Canuck Pavol Demitra's shocking demise in the Lokomotiv plane crash made me wonder if this team is in fact, cursed.
It's so amazing to see the Canucks honouring Rypien's memory with their participation in the Mindcheck.ca project. It's great because it can provide people trying to understand what someone they're close with is going through and how to help them with that first, and very crucial step: refusing to stay silent. Depression is nothing to be ashamed of. It's not a weakness. It's not an excuse. The pain that I (and MrsWaachcast, who has also suffered from this) have endured is not from being weak, lazy or disinterested. And the battle is not over for us. She is still fighting hard, day after day, as I am myself.
I have been working hard to fight against the most visible scar from this ordeal: the huge amount of weight I put on through the depression, a combination of eating to numb the pain, inactivity and the wonderful side effect of the medications I was on to treat my illness. I know that some people swear by medicinal remedies, and for a number of people, because it is a chemical issue, it's a necessary thing. I feel like the medications I was on overall did me more harm than good, the side effects still lingering as my body rids itself of the last traces. I am not saying I am anti-medication. It just didn't do for me what my doctor and I had hoped it would. Indeed some people can come out of depression naturally. What is right for you is up to you and your doctor, ultimately.
So where from here? Well, today I am going to post a video at Mindcheck, my pledge to fight, and I would love to see you all do the same. Lend your voice and let those you know see that you have their back. I know that this could come back, and when it does, with Laurie at my side I know I will defeat it. Rick Rypien may have lost his battle, but his memory will give us the strength to win the war. Thank you, to each and every one of you for allowing me to share our story with you. You all played a part in recovering from this, with this amazing community we know as Nucks Misconduct. For Rick. For Wade Belak. For Derek Boogaard. For everyone touched by this. I will not stay silent.
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Thanks for coming forward and openly sharing your personal experiences again, Kent.
Makes me so happy to hear about the enormous strides you have made and continue to make.
Your article last year was a huge eye opener for me into the day to day dealings with illness, and one of the best I have read to date. Once again you have done an amazing job relaying what it is like to be in your position and honouring others who suffer.
Nucks Misconduct's chief slab of man meat.
thanks
It’s a day to day struggle, and like I said, an emotional one. But emotional responses are never a bad thing, just a sign you’re alive. The support from all of you means the world to us.
One of those jerks from Nucks Misconduct
@KentBaskyNM
Holy crap. Look at Rome!!- Sean Zandberg
i've been lucky with meds
No weight gain, and more, i actually have energy to move around once in a while! Also they don’t mess me up. The G/f was on effexor, and man, that stuff was brutal. i’m on cipralex.
"Planet Earth is blue, and there's nothing I can do."
Dropping F-bombs since the early 70's.
'Nucks Misconduct Sr. VP of Inappropriateness and Questionable Conduct, second director of immaturity. @Twitchy67
I was on
Effexor, Trazodone and Wellbutrin. As of last week I have lost about 40 of the 90 lbs that I put on. It’s nice to feel lucid, and have energy again. Those meds wiped me out…
One of those jerks from Nucks Misconduct
@KentBaskyNM
Holy crap. Look at Rome!!- Sean Zandberg
i used wellbutrin
to quit smoking years ago. Worked at the time…unfortunately tho…heh
The cipralex has been a fucking godsend; i have a mental clarity I hadn’t felt in years. Also enthusiasm for things.
"Planet Earth is blue, and there's nothing I can do."
Dropping F-bombs since the early 70's.
'Nucks Misconduct Sr. VP of Inappropriateness and Questionable Conduct, second director of immaturity. @Twitchy67
awesome to hear
I am sure that the meds helped speed up recovery, but there were a lot of negatives for me
One of those jerks from Nucks Misconduct
@KentBaskyNM
Holy crap. Look at Rome!!- Sean Zandberg
Someone
very close to be is on cipralex as well. They’ve never been healthier and happier. Great to hear it’s helped others too!
It's all hot bishes, naps, and dance parties
Well done Kent
I have had family members affected in the past, and its hard to get people not affected to understand.
Your heartfelt sincerity is at the heart of recovery my man. Keep fighting….
The inspiration drawn from recovery is at the core too. My family member is even more positive than I am! ;-)
Nuck’s Misconduct Bishop, 1st United Church of Luongod. "First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win." Gandhi. I think he was a Canucks fan...
@Vancitydan Writer at Nucks Misconduct
Inspiring
Kent, I appreciate and am inspired by your openness, honesty, and willingness to help others suffering from depression. It’s fantastic that you have been able to deal with and be open about about your struggles, and that at the same time you have encouraged people to share their stories and to seek help if they need it.
Good on ya buddy, keep up the awesome work.
Contributor to Nucks Misconduct
Editor of Hockey in Society
Thank you as always for writing so candidly about this Kent! Getting it out there is such a wonderful thing to do. It’s so lovely to hear someone making great strides. I’m the same way with Ryp. You see something beautiful like a sunset and your breath still catches when you suddenly think “Ryp’s not here to see this” But at least mindcheck is inspiring people and doing such great work!
It's all hot bishes, naps, and dance parties
For Rick. For Wade Belak. For Derek Boogaard. For everyone touched by this. I will not stay silent.
Amen. As someone who has not personally suffered from depresssion, but knows people who have, the post last year was an eye-opener.
Great to hear that you doing better!
They once made a Kevin Bieksa toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
#37 Ryp
you are an inspiration Kent
You and Laurie are wonderful people, but your willingness to share this experience is beyond wonderful :) If you have helped even one person by sharing your story then that is amazing :) (and I am sure your words have helped at least one)
I don’t have experience with these issues (personally or friends/family that I know of) and so I appreciate your willingness to share so that I may learn more about these issues as well.
Thank you for opening up to us about a difficult subject :)
Go Canucks Go!
I greatly admire people like you
who have the courage to speak out in public about something that sadly has been taboo. You have already made a positive difference to many people – that’s for sure. Good on you!
Wow! Where to start...
First, I am a retired RN whose career spanned psychiatry, geriatrics, death & dying, palliative care and spiritual care. All of which helped to shape the person I’ve become.
Second, I have experienced a mild depression of my own years ago so I know but a taste of what you’ve gone through Kent.
Third, I have a 37 yo daughter in Tasmania, Aus who has rapid-cycling bipolar II. About a month ago she went public to friends and co-workers about her struggles. I am very proud of her. It hasn’t been easy. She is the mom of two young girls and holds down a full-time job as a planner at the State of Tasmania’s Parks & Wildlife. But her marriage has suffered. Families need all the support they can get!
I am so proud of our Canucks being part of this initiative to end the silence, to blow fresh winds through the taboo of talking about mental health issues. And I am honoured by your openly sharing with us your own struggles Kent. I’ve only become a member of Nucks Misconduct this past fall but I am beyond impressed with the compassion, the sharing, the human-ness that is evidenced in this community. That “We Are All Canucks” and are connected by our passion not only for this incredible, classy hockey team, the Vancouver Canucks, but also by a decency and integrity that is refeshing to be part of, makes me come back every day to check in. Thank you Kent Basky! And all the very best as you continue on this journey called life.
"Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for." -Bob Marley
@cefair
Kent...
I don’t know what you, the Canucks organization or Mindcheck are trying to do here, but all this “attention” has definitely made me aware of this debilitating and potentially deadly condition. If that’s your goal…be assured, it’s working!
This and “the little green box” is not something that I expected when I started reading this Hockey blog… thank you.
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