And Boom Goes the Dynamite (Now with more Juice)

Kesler does the impossible


Ryan Kesler, or as he is known to those outside Vancouver, Ryan Kessler, dropped a bomb on the world yesterday. Was it another photobomb, mayhaps of him appearing behind Henrik Sedin, clutching a mario brothers action figure acting out the alternate ending to the 90's movie (Where Bowser ends up with Mario)? No? Maybe it was Kesler scoring on one leg to put a game into overtime that the Canucks had no business being in? No? Well what was it then?

Ryan Kesler is bringing the Juice. What was that you say? I said, KESLER IS BRINGING THE JUICE. Kesler somehow convinced Kevin Bieksa to join twitter. Bieksa, who has often in the past said he would never join twitter, somehow ended up on twitter last night. The catch? Kesler said Bieksa wouldn't tweet until he got 10,000 followers. What followed on Twitter can best be described as the opening scene of Saving Private Ryan, as people began pouring in online to follow Juice. Friends called up ex-lovers, parents call up kids they hadn't talked to in years, cousins called up ex-lovers, some of whom were cousins, even pets began signing up for Twitter, all in the hopes of getting Bieksa his 10,000 followers. It mere hours, Bieksa gained 10,000 followers. The Canuck Nation had come through once again. 

And so the next day, Bieksa gave us his tweet, giving a shout out to his buddy Rypien, and posting a picture of Kesler getting an IV. Is it really Bieksa? Is Kesler just Bieksa-Bombing us? We don't fully know yet. But it's going to be a fun ride regardless. And if it is real Bieksa, I won't stop until he follows me. I have my goal this season. Bieksa, I say this to you; You followed me once before, and it got you to the finals. Imagine what could happen if you follow me twice???

News and notes after the jump! Apparently the Canucks have some sort of day camp going on right now? Also, don't forget, Mark Mancari, PRE-SEASON CHAMP, 2011!

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Vancouver News and Notes:

 

  • Ta-Da, T-Dance Shiny Pants, Thomas Drance, was too lazy to do an article for me to link to you guys today. Typical. So instead, Ta-Da apparently hires out workers to do his dirty work. In this case Justin Morissette, an aspiring journalism student at BCIT, was sent to cover the Canucks training camp over the weekend. I hear Justin was paid with one doughnut, two days old, a Pavel Bure hockey card back when he wore #96, and three slaps to the face so he remembers his place in the hierarchy of the Canucks Army. Justin shares his thoughts on the players and his time spent backstage with the Canucks. It's a good read, so go give it a look at [Canucks Army]
  • Iain MacIntyre tackles the idea of short summers being a challenge for the Canucks. With players fitness levels being at an all time high, and with Commandant Gary Roberts leading the charge with the young guns in the NHL, short summers probably have less impact than ever before. Read about the Canucks fitness levels and a very vivid description of Cody Hodgson's abs (Thirteen metaphors are used, my favorite being "Cody's abs are like the Nile, un-ending, rippling, and impossible to look away from"). [National Post]
  • Terry Bell has an article about the Canucks fourth line. In the article AV discusses how beneficial it would be to have a 4th line with an identity, and how last year, it took a long while before they got their 4th line together. Shockingly AV seems to ignore the fact he kept pushing AHL fodder on the 4th line all year, rode Tanner Glass all year long, and generally did everything in his power to make our 4th line terrible. At least Gillis has made this year interesting by bringing in 27636727 players by my count to battle for those 4th line spots. But can one really call it a battle if the champ is already here? MARK MANCARI, 4TH LINE CHAMPION. [The Province]

    Mark_mancari_pre-season_champ_medium

  •  One of the big themes this year for the Canucks is the PTO being handed out like candy. Todd Fedoruk, Manny Legace, and Owen Nolan are the poster childs for the Canucks current PTO, so if you want to read an in depth look into the minds of Todd Fedoruk, I've got you covered. The CBC goes over the role of fighting in hockey with Fedoruk, talks about how Owen Nolan has the strength of 30 Aaron Romes, and nothing is said about Manny Legace, as everyone considered this for the best. [CBC]
  • Ben Kuzma makes the case for Cory Scheider being an essential cog in the machine of the Canucks 2012 playoff run. Is it because Cory has a fiery passion that will light the team on fire? Will it be because Cory has more upside than Luongo? Or is it because Cory makes a mean butter chicken? Find out at [The Province]
  • Oddly enough, the entire wave of hate against Luongo, the entire cry of "Luongo is overrated" seems to be slowly swinging the other way. I guess after beating a guy into the ground for so many years, your arms get tired. As such, several stories are starting to leak out that say 'Hey, that Luongo guy isn't actually that bad of a goalie. He actually might be the best Canucks goalie of all time." Jim Morris over at the Winnipeg Free Press (The paper that will cover all of the Jets losses to the Canucks) has a good article on Luongo [Winnipeg Free Press]
  • The 4th line is discussed once again. I have a feeling 80 article will be written about our 4th line as we have so many players fighting for spots. This time Brad Ziemer throws his hat in the ring over the 4th line debate, and I find his article to be the best one. Why you ask? Because he has a quote from Mark Mancari. [Vancouver Sun]
  • Want to add 10 pounds of muscle? Go visit Gary Roberts. One look from Gary and you'll gain 1 pound alone. Chris Tanev did this and added 10 pounds over the summer. I just hope it isn't the Sopel 10 pounds, the kind that leave you slow as hell, makes your wife do a terrible blog, and makes you hurt your back picking up crackers. [The Province]
NHL News and Notes:

I don't have time for News and Notes, so here's what you missed:

Chris Pronger made captain of the Flyers
- Bogosian signed a 2 year deal with the Jets worth $5 million,
- Luke Schenn signed a 5 year $18 million dollar deal, and yes, I am sure Pierre McGuire openly weeped with happiness over his HUMAN ERASER getting locked up long term
- Drew Doughty remains unsigned and will have his contract offers lessened for each day he remains unsigned
- The Red Sox are choking, I know this isn't hockey news, but wtf

And one link, the Leafs and Senators third jerseys were leaked. [Icethetics]
I like the Senators jersey. The Leafs have perhaps the worst 3rd jerseys ever in that the only thing that ever changes is the width of the stripes, and occasionally how many points their Leaf has. I honestly don't know why they bother releasing new Leafs jerseys.

Alright, see you tomorrow! Tomorrow will have video of the day and all my usual amazing NHL links, today I was pressed for time due to real life responsibilities. Sean pays me in harsh insults and threats on my life. I have to make money other ways, alas.

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