And Boom Goes the Dynamite (Thursday Links)

Did you know?

On this day in 1994, Mark Messier went to a strip club, entered the boy scouts, went back to a strip club, stripped their scout leader of his captaincy, went back again to a strip club, then managed to burn down an orphanage? This is known as a New York hat trick.

Messier jokes of course can mean only one thing, and that is that it's Thursday! One day away from Friday! Which means all those killer articles people have done up about the Canucks and hockey in general are being saved for Friday. Which leaves us scraping the barrel for content on a summer Thursday. But fear not! For I have found some worthy links to pass your time while you pretend to be working.

"How's that report coming Johnson?"
"As good as an Aaron Rome icing!"
"Uh....good work I suppose.....keep it up"

Aaron Rome; Making mediocrity passable since 2010.

And away we go!

Vancouver Canuck News:

  • Tony Gallagher auditions early for the role of Scrooge as he puts his foot down on any and all sporting shenanigans. Clint Eastwood is looking into playing the role of a young Tony Gallagher trying to make his way in the world amongst all the hippie hairdos and rocker and roller music. [The Province]
  • You think the CBC is anti-west? Think again! The Globe and Mail eats your shitty unfounded theories for breakfast. Apparently they are higher in fiber than the crackpot theories, which are mostly just sugar. "We're not anti-west, we just don't really like the west" explains the CBC. [Globe and Mail]
  • Want to know about the third string goalie who got invited to the Canucks rookie camp?? Of course you do! [News 1130] Also, please note that Jensen's favorite team is the Sharks (We all make mistakes when we're young), his favorite player is Ryan Miller (I assume he enjoys slumping over in front of Crosby as well?), and his favorite music is 'anything'. When someone says their favorite music is 'anything' it means only one thing; Abba. [Vancouver Giants]
  • Also, according to Nathan Horton, Aaron Rome can't even apologize properly. Though to his credit, Aaron Rome made the safe play and iced the apology off the glass. "Dear Nathan. I am sorry you like to admire your passes. Sincerely, Aaron Rome." [Puck Daddy]
  • Thomas Druce from Canucks Army weighs in on RomeGate2011. Does he support Horton? Does he support Rome? This is as intense a struggle as watching the person on Price is Right debate on if they should bid on Showcase number one! [Canucks Army]

NHL News and Notes:

  • Oh man, it feels like I just got a baseball to the nuts here. Why is this happening. I can't explain it. OH WAIT. Another Bruins celebration story. Awesome. I certainly can't get enough of Tim Thomas, I can tell you that much. Apparently Roberto Luongo had a corn maze done in his honor in Chilliwack, but the pad flaps they cut into the maze for him kept stopping everybody. [Puck Daddy]
  • Want to pretend the Blues have a shot at the playoffs? Go read NHL.com's latest piece. Here's a hint: It involves the Avalanche continuing to MASSIVELY overpay for players. Or as Paul Stastny's dad would say "Uh, hey, what the **** was that". [NHL.COM]
  • The Buffalo Sabres discover that there may indeed be something called a salary cap. "To be honest, we thought it was just a rumor. I actually thought it was a kind of specialty iced coffee. Like 'hey, give me a salary cap please!'" The Hockey News offers up some views on how Buffalo can deal with their cap issues. The story is sandwiched in between the 1283838123 ads they have. [The Hockey News]

The Off the Stanchion Link of The Day (In that it's surprising. And sometimes terribly mean. And somewhat unjust at times.)

  • Want to sum up every single Canuck fan after game 7? [Canucks.com]
  • Want to kinda redeem yourself by making fun of one of the few teams we are allowed to make fun of? [Canucks.com]

Video of the Day:

How do I spruce up your Thursday and get you through to Friday with precious precious weekend momentum? Why with hockey violence of course!

The Hardest Hockey Hit in The World Watch It its Hilarious (via Luis6311)

 

Good hit. Or as Raffi Torres would call it, "warming up."

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