'Twas the Night Before Puck Drop
Well, it's finally here folks! The Canucks season kicks off tomorrow against our old arch-rival, and season opener punching bag, the Calgary Flames. In honour of this exciting day, I present to you a poem, inspired by "The Night Before Christmas." Originally I was going to mimic the whole thing, but it turns out the poem is pretty frickin' long - so consider this an abridged version.
I'm sure we will all be going to bed tonight with visions of Stanley dancing in our heads. Or visions of Rick Rypien tuning Brandon Prust. Either way, enjoy the poem and LET'S DROP THE DAMN PUCK ALREADY!!!
THE NIGHT BEFORE PUCK DROP
'Twas the night before puck drop, and throughout GM Place
Nothing was stirring - not puck, stick nor skate.
The jerseys were hung in the dressing room, good,
With an XXXL one for Kyle Wellwood.
Hansen's hand was snuggled all tight in a cast,
And Hodgson is sad ‘cause his pro stint didn't last.
MG, wiping his brow, and AV, plotting traps,
Had just got the roster under the cap.
When out in streets there arose such a riot,
Female 'Nucks fans longing for Pyatt -
Sure Luongo is go(o)d, but he's not such a looker.
But we all hope he thrives in this year's pressure cooker.
The moon on the streets of quiet Vancouver
Lit a city that soon would be gripped by 'Nucks fever.
When, what to my wondering eyes should I see?
Swedish twins! (Sadly not of the hot variety.)
And two agitators, Burrows and Kesler,
Who can be more obnoxious than professional wrestlers.
And more rapid than eagles, a speedster named Mason,
Who, along with Steve Bernier ,20-goals will be chasin'.
And another Swede, with Cup pedigree,
As well as a Rocket, a new Russian mystery.
And three solid grinders, who check and who fight,
Who fly under the radar out of the spotlight.
"Now Edler! Now Ehrhoff! Now Salo, Bieksa!
On SOB! On Lukowich! On Mitchell! On Schnieder!
To the boards to make hits! To the ice to block shots!
Now score on the PP, now score lots and lots!"
So cried Vigneault, as he leapt from his bed,
As visions of Stanley danced through his head.
Canucks fans rejoiced, as the dawn finally broke -
Hockey is back, and everyone's stoked.
"The season is here," we yell and we cheer,
And we hope, and we pray, that this is the year.
So I say to Canuckland, as the season starts up:
"GO CANUCKS GO, AND BRING US THE CUP!!!"
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25 comments
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Comments
You know…that wasn’t too bad all! :)
by Sean Zandberg on Sep 30, 2009 1:59 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Haha that’s pretty good. I think you set a precedent though. Now we’ll expect a poem before each game.
by SteveNux on Sep 30, 2009 2:27 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Haha, thanks, but maybe I’ll save it for big games. ’Less you want some dirty limericks…
by nucksandpucks on Sep 30, 2009 2:46 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Ummmm....
Think you got me there!
by nucksandpucks on Sep 30, 2009 2:51 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I was tempted to write something regarding the Bataan Death March that has been my experience as a life-long Canuck fan (theirs, not mine) , but that poem is gold. Good work, N&P.
I've seen enough to know that I've seen too much.
by Smoboy41 on Sep 30, 2009 2:42 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Totally concur...
Anyone that can get a rhyming stanza rocking and still use Luongo is aces in my books…
vancitydan
by vancitydan on Sep 30, 2009 10:41 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
May we all sip the tears of Flames players and fans together as one.
/goes back to sleep
by Sneps-ish on Sep 30, 2009 2:46 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
amazing. well done.
http://canuckpuckbunny.blogspot.com
GO CANUCKS GO!
by missy on Sep 30, 2009 3:29 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
I did the same thing last year for my fantasy hockey league. I would post it for you but there is a lot of references to transsexuals, pedophiles and things of that nature. You know how it is when you are in a fantasy league with your friends. You write some things on the message board you might never say in real life.
Anyway, I know how hard something like this can be…well done.
by Section 312 on Sep 30, 2009 3:39 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Really good!
Go Nucks!
Andrew Raycroft for backup? Does not compute.
by Woodinville_12thMan on Sep 30, 2009 4:40 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Twas the night before hockey
And all through Canucks Nation
Daniel is flexing his pipes
And Henrik has a tingly sensation
Rypien said “Give me Prust because I’m gonna grind him”
Hodgson was in Ontario where nobody could find him.
Shirokov is anxious to play with the vets
And Bernier has nightmares about missing open nets
Kesler’s in his stall thinking about Mats Sundin
And Hordichuk thinks his skills are like BJ Crombeen’s
AV sits on his throne smiling about Tanner Glass
While Wellwood’s in front of the mirror checking out his ass
..that’s all I got..ad lib. Time to draft again! Whoop!
by Sean Zandberg on Sep 30, 2009 5:00 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Think you should change your name to Sean-Z, get Rihanna to sing back-up, throw in some cuss words and make yourself a rap single!
by nucksandpucks on Sep 30, 2009 7:02 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I was tempted to do something similar, but faltered after an opening line about with “not a creature was stirring, not even Bob Rouse.”
More fun than a stick to the face!
On the Forecheck is SB Nation's blog covering the Nashville Predators.
by Dirk Hoag on Sep 30, 2009 6:13 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
You’d have to work “more fun than a stick to the face” somewhere in there too
'Nucks Misconduct - Housing Swedish Millionaires Since 2000.
by Yankee Canuck on Oct 1, 2009 12:03 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Thanks guys!
Glad you enjoyed it :)
by nucksandpucks on Sep 30, 2009 7:02 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Bravo!
Next, a Shakespearian Sonnet! Er, you do take requests, yes?
by Thursday on Sep 30, 2009 7:38 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Okay, I’ll work on it.
Um, it’s been a little while since I did an English major in undergrad. Are Shakespearean sonnets ABAB CDCD EFEF GG? Or is that Petrarchan?
by nucksandpucks on Sep 30, 2009 9:13 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
that’s shakespearean.
the other one is ABBA CDDC EFGEFG or something like that.
http://canuckpuckbunny.blogspot.com
GO CANUCKS GO!
by missy on Sep 30, 2009 9:15 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Okay, I’ll work on it.
Um, it’s been a little while since I did an English major in undergrad. Are Shakespearean sonnets ABAB CDCD EFEF GG? Or is that Petrarchan?
by nucksandpucks on Sep 30, 2009 9:13 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
That was fucking art! So excited, I can’t sleep. Go ’Nucks!
by trotski on Sep 30, 2009 11:30 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs

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