Kyle Wellwood, tired of the fat jokes, eats rice all summer long to keep his physique up to snuff. Unfortunately O'Brien forgot to toss him a steak once in a while and Kyle turned back into a leaf (in the wind). Or a waif.

No Canucks news makes Zanstorm a very bored man. So bring on the Photoshop!

Wellwood's arbitration hearings will commence this week. We will know soon what the going price for Wood is. Where the hell is he in all of this? I haven't heard a peep from the guy all summer. Maybe he's laying on a cot with Mats in Sweden talking about the good old days. Perhaps he's repeatedly riding the slide in the kids' play area at McDonald's somewhere. I have no clue.

(Hey, there's two more Photoshop ideas right there.)