Let's all watch the game! At a sports bar edition
So you've finally found a way to watch the hockey game at a sports bar. Congratulations. Tonight, your favorite team is up against Liberty City's Ice Knights, which means, hopefully, your sports bar will be free of any fans rooting against the visiting team. Sure, both of you enjoyed/experienced/gagged on Mark Messier as an active player on your roster, but tonight, the only common element both your teams have is a high profile player named Henrik. With that being said, here's your guide to maximizing enjoyment of the game!
PRE-GAME: Stake out spot in sports bar that reminds you most of home, preferably the one closest to a wall in case you need to lean on it later (why later? keep reading). Shoot glare at fans who are cheering for other teams/other sports going on and mock their struggles heroically. Order your favorite beer and an appetizer. Hell, order two.
CANUCKS SCORE FIRST!!! That's why you came here. You wanted to see how others would react. You know your family's reaction. Your wife will fake a cheer, your kid will stare blankly at the television, and your pet will do what he always does. It's a shame, however, you're the only one cheering. Get yourself another beer.
RANGERS STRIKE BACK. Quietly sip your beer. Do not get too crazy. Do not answer the phone -- your co-worker is calling, taunting you. Ask waitress for an RC Cola.
RANGERS SCORE AGAIN. From here on out you can do one of two things... take a shot any time the Rangers score or take a shot any time the Canucks, you know, take a shot. It's Tuesday Night in the city...
RAYCROFT GETS PULLED. Sing your favorite song.
SCHNEIDER GETS SCORED ON. Can't help you there.
Hopefully you remembered to get a seat against the wall because balance becomes an issue after a couple drinks and the wall is there to save your ace and your face. Leave a good tip and drag yourself home, knowing the road ahead is long indeed...
Then go puke in Marian Gaborik's yard.
PRED: NYR 4, VAN 2
1 recs |
9 comments
Comments
What’s the deal with RC cola?
I've seen enough to know that I've seen too much.
by Smoboy41 on Nov 3, 2009 5:09 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
RC Cola = My nickname for Raycroft. Why? Much cheaper than the original (Luongo) but way different. Though he’s been pretty fair these last two times out…
"What is Jumanji?" --Jason Owens
by GoodKeith on Nov 3, 2009 11:40 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Its refreshing and cheap.
Or maybe they still use real coke.
My two guesses…
vancitydan
by vancitydan on Nov 3, 2009 5:48 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
What do you drink if SOB stabs at Avery from the bench?
'Nucks Misconduct - Housing Swedish Millionaires Since 2000.
by Yankee Canuck on Nov 3, 2009 9:59 PM PST reply actions 0 recs
I’ll bite…..what?
I've seen enough to know that I've seen too much.
by Smoboy41 on Nov 3, 2009 10:05 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
I don’t know, but it should be as painful as watching it. Like a mug of peach schnapps and sour milk, then someone punches you in the stomach and you sprint 400 yards. Yeah…that feels about right.
'Nucks Misconduct - Housing Swedish Millionaires Since 2000.
by Yankee Canuck on Nov 4, 2009 5:01 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs
Glad to be wrong
I am 0-2 on my predictions when I write these things.
"What is Jumanji?" --Jason Owens
by GoodKeith on Nov 3, 2009 11:37 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs
OK, you’re back to GoodKeith then. Keep it up :)
by Sean Zandberg on Nov 4, 2009 12:25 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

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