Nucks Misconduct: An SB Nation Community

Navigation: Jump to content areas:


Pro Quality. Fan Perspective.
Login-facebook
Around SBN: Off Tackle Empire interviews Rich Rodriguez

Luongo song and the Hockey Names story

Just a bit of old stuff that I am re-posting to maybe give you some extra cheer.

The Luongo song. (Bingo Bango Bongo Man) Still makes me laugh.

I can't find the audio for the following segment, but at least I had typed it out last December. This is some of the funniest hockey humor ever.

***WARNING: DIIIIRRRTY"

So our day begins at the golf course where I have been battling in
the Lindy Ruff all day. We call it quits and head into the club house
for some Bob Beers and some Kelly Buchburgers. After crushing
many drinks we decided to hit the local night club to check out
some Carl Dykhuis and some Joe Nieuwendykes.
I noticed that I was getting eyeballed by some Neil Sheehy and she had a bit of a
Doug Weight problem. A real Jamie McCOWan. I thought to myself
"I can't stoop this Patrick Marleau". She wanted to take off, and I
wasn't sticking around for the ugly lights to come on, so I paid the
Rick Tabaracci and we hopped in a Tomas Kaberle.
I took her back to my Phil Housley where things got a little hot and steamy. She geared down and not to my surprise her Keri Taco was a bit Joe Reekie and Jason Wooley. I decided she needed a Bill Barber, pulled out my Donald Brashears and shaved her hair diaper down to
the Randy Wood.
She then proceeded to trim my Harry Snepsts and the bush around my Pekka Rautakeileo. I then reacted quickly and popped her Don Cherry but she was too Ken Dryden, so I flipped
her over, grabbed my Haken Loob and threw it in her Curtis Brown with no Tie Domi.
After a few pumps she started to complain that she was too Marty Mcsorley to go on. So I snapped and quickly showed her to the Daryl Sydor and told her maybe I'll call her
Brendon Morrow. Needless to say she was Grant Fuhrious.
The next morning I had the worst Darren Puppa and I was Valeri Zelepukin all day. And two weeks later I noticed a Travis Green drip oozing from my Mike Babcock. So I booked an appointment with Dr. Randy Gregg and got a Corey Schwab.
But that isn't the end of the story!
A month later I woke up and saw Garth Snow outside. The weather man said it was going to be a 30% chance of a Theo Fleury. My car wouldn't start so I had to borrow my roommate's car. It's not as Chris Osgoode as mine and it takes a Roberto Luongo time to start, but I was stuck. When I went in his room to get the keys, there was that same Rick Brodsky with my roommate! She was sucking on his Mike Peca while Esa Tikannen his temperature with her finger. I
said "Buddy, don't do it! That Butch Goring has the fans clapping! I think she picked it up in Paul Kariya!" But he wouldn't listen to Marty Reasoner.
Finally I said "keep up the Manny Legace", and ran out.


I think it's almost time to create another one of those stories. Maybe I'll try one out, or maybe we could have a contest....we'll see.

T Tags:

0 recs  |  Comment 2 comments |

Story-email Email Printer Print

More from Nucks Misconduct

Relive The Moment

Mar 2010 by Sean Zandberg - 4 comments

Ken Henderson strikes again

Aug 2007 by Sean Zandberg - 3 comments

Joke: Honeymoon night

Oct 2008 by Sean Zandberg - 0 comments

Comments

Display:

Visit http://www.offensivhockey.blogspot.com

The blog is about Allsvenskan, the Swedish Elitserien, KHL (New Russian hockeyligan), NHL
and other hockey

Why?

For that it is there for all languages and that all can
understand it. Visit and see!

You also have a very good blog.

by offensivhockey on Aug 12, 2008 7:07 AM PDT reply actions  

Shameless self promotion from these people, huh?
They feed you the "you're blog is very good" line and then expect a link.
Ah heck, I probably did the same thing when I started. But I wasn't THAT bad.

by Sean Zandberg on Aug 13, 2008 5:06 PM PDT reply actions  

Comments For This Post Are Closed


User Tools

Welcome to the Nucks Misconduct community! We scour the web to promptly bring you all of the Vancouver Canucks news when it happens in brutally honest and highly-opinionated fashion.
Start posting about the Canucks »

Join SB Nation and dive into communities focused on all your favorite teams.

Connect_with_facebook

FanPosts

Community blog posts and discussion.

Recommended FanPosts

Trevorlinden_small
Beantown lawyered them Toronto folk right and good!

Recent FanPosts

Seanprofile2_small
Sedins To Make Appearance At NHL 11 Launch in Burnaby
Small
Cup run a cakewalk or are Canucks creampuffs?
Canucks_alt_small
5 Reasons Why The GZ Expat Loves the Canucks
Vancouver_millionaires_small
Raffi Torres: Worth it?
Canucks_alt_small
Moving Sucks...except
Gabe_and_stanley_small
Third Line Forwards?
Jp_small
Luongo Writes Foreword For James Duthie Book
Jp_small
Canucks At 40 Book Available Early
Small
5 Reasons Why I Love the Canucks

+ New FanPost All FanPosts >

Follow The Misconduct

Facebook-128x128_medium
Twitter-128x128_medium

SBNation.com Recent Stories

PHILADELPHIA - MAY 16:  A fan of the Philadelphia Flyers holds up a sign reading "Next Goalie" behind goalie Carey Price #32 of the Montreal Canadiens in Game 1 of the Eastern Conference Finals during the 2010 NHL Stanley Cup Playoffs at Wachovia Center on May 16, 2010 in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.  (Photo by Bruce Bennett/Getty Images)

Habs Finally Lock Up Carey Price, Sign Goalie To Two-Year Deal

National Hockey League commissioner Gary Bettman answers questions during a pre-game media availability before the Pittsburgh Penguins season opener against the New York Rangers in a NHL hockey game in Pittsburgh, Friday, Oct. 2, 2009. (AP Photo/Gene J. Puskar) +25 updates

Ultimatum? NHL Reportedly Threatens To Toss Out Kovalchuk, Luongo Deals Without NHLPA Concessions

Photo +1 updates

Report: Donald Fehr Hands NHLPA List Of Conditions On Becoming Union Leader

More from SBNation.com >


Bartenders

Jasonmask_small Yankee Canuck

Seanprofile2_small Sean Zandberg

Pub Regulars

Bcmf_small WAACH 'Cast

Vancouver046cropped_small missy

Flyers_canucks_historical_small Smoboy41

6_058_small nucksandpucks